I have weak knees. I really do. I can't kneel properly. Not that I need to. I mean kneeling is something an acrobat would need to do a lot. Or a monk. Or a prostitute (Yes, think about it. Now dwell on that thought. And say," ewwwwwww...."). Anyhow, back the story of my knees. Yes, my knees are weak. I feel old because of this. I think my body is wearing down on me before my prime.
And that's all that I've got to say. I have weak knees and they trouble me so. Because I can't do sports as often as I used to. You know how you have friends that tell you stuff about certain things that makes as much sense as wearing a leather jacket in mid-day in Brunei. It's mind-boggling how some people can derive such "clear" answers to some of life's most useless questions.
Here are some of the things that I've heard over the years:
- If you masturbate too much, you'll have weak knees. Yes, someone said that to me. And no, I don't. I am not going to defend myself on that either. SERIOUSLY, I don't, okayyyyy!!!! Has it ever occurred to anyone that I used to be on the heavier side and I play football a lot? Gawdddd~
- If you're having constant backaches, it means you've had too much bedroom action. Really now?
- Don't point at a rainbow with your index finger or else you'll lose it. Use your thumb if you must.
- To see if a person is a virgin or not. It's by the way they walk or by the curve of one's ass.
These are just a few off the top of my head. Funny how the only ones that I remember are the ones that are related to sex. I need to meet more people. I need to make more guy friends. It has come to my attention that I have lost contact with most of them. Yes, I do hangout with a certain person named Daus. But I cannot really define what gender he is of. I can never really say. He is more like an amphibian to me. You know, of two worlds.
Speaking of which, my genderly-ambiguous friend is flying off to Australia to further his dream to become a drag queen.
Kidding....
He's off to pursue his career as a Occupational Health Nurse. Wooohhhooooo...
Firdaus, or Floral Vajajay as he is fondly referred to in some circles, will embark on a 3 year course to soul-search, research and obviously obtain his degree. Hopefully, this "little paperclip" will not be bent for long and come back... dare I say it... a man!!!
I wish him the best of luck. And proudly say that he will NOT be missed by me. This country needs that break from you.
Oh, and Victoria Chong needs a mention somewhere. SO this is me saying that Victoria Chong made my day today.
*sigh* Yes, I am sorry. This is not a lengthy post. I am sorry. Yes, this sucks doesn't it.
Good night, everyone.
Yep, it's me, the heterosexual male, Elvis.
So what is going on in my dark and angry world as of late?
Meh. Not much.
This would make the 92nd entry in my pitiful collection of entries since I started blogging more than a year ago. How pathetic!! Why can't I blog as frequently as
The Great One? Oh how I tremble in thy shadow Annabella Chong. But then again, I'm not as jobless as she is. Heh heh heh.
Oh gross. I just read this article about this cannibalistic cult. Hold on here's an excerpt.
A seven year old boy in the Czech republic was found chained in the cellar of his home, where his family kept him and abused him in a very perverse way.
The child, Ondrej Mauerova, was kept confined as his family would EAT parts of him!!!!
The child had been partially skinned as his crazed 31 year old mother, Klara, caged him for months.
Relatives who were also in the cannibalistic cult would feast on the child's raw flesh.
Ondrej and his helpless nine year old brother were kept in cages. At times they were handcuffed to tables as they were ritually and brutally burnt, whipped with belts, and tortured.
Sick!!!!!!
:(
Even a being of twisted mind such as I, feel sick. SICK! The world is definitely going to the shitter.
But don't worry, the boys got rescued in the end. :( Read the whole story
here.
Forgive me if I don't sound like myself today... I have a very good reason. Believe me, it's a solid reason ;)
I should talk more about myself. Yes yes.
I like rock. (The music, not the batu)
I like horror movies. Even gross disgusting ones like Long Khong. I like Long Khong! Also I went fishing a few nights ago. It reminded me of Long Khong. heh heh heh. I wanna watch the sequel!! It had something with cutting tongues. I dunno, I heard it from Bella who watched the trailer through her fingers.
Err.... I like the fart jokes. HAHAHAH
Sigh, I'm bored. I'm so bored. Everyone's asleep or MIA at the moment. Grrr.
Oh, and I like putting pictures of random cats as my display pic. ZOMG! I dunno why. I find them cute hehehe.
I wonder why nobody comes around here often. My posts are interesting aren't they? Asides from being long-winded and hard to understand sometimes.... And I miss my spastic typos. WAH! How come they go away ah? lol.
Its unbalivable hw so little peepil come in this blog, thestinkymongoose.
Oh bella's going to bali in july. Bella ke Bali kan bali barley HAHAHAHAHAHA
I'm such a comic genius :D
Oh and I'm such a meanie to Daus, even though he is my BFF.
Okie dokes.
I go now
xoxox the stinky mongoose
If I could pick one word to describe my life now, it would be "idle". It has come to a complete standstill. And that would be an understatement. At this point, the speed at which snails move is actually exceeding the speed limit of my life. Each passing day is longer than the last when there's nothing much to... I mean NOTHING AT ALL to do. Waiting for the days when I'll be employed is extremely dull, nerve wrecking and yet intriguingly exciting.
So what do you do when your life slows down? I decided to reflect at what I've accomplished so far.
I realise there wasn't much. But I'm neither sad nor disappointed about that. Really I'm not. All my life, people have told me that I can do well and excel more than most. I chose not to. There is a very simple reason to this. I hate being in the limelight. I love watching the show rather than be in the show. My outlook in life now is that whatever comes my way I'll just seize it and not look back. I guess that's the way I've always been. I never take pride in being better than anyone in anything. I am one of those people who choose not to answer a question correctly in class but instead help out a friend who wants to answer.
I hate standing out in a group. I just do. I don't know why exactly. I know this sounds sad but for me it's not. Trust me when I say that I am not one that would stand out in public. I am just one of those normal looking guys that passes you by and you would not notice. I am as normal as anyone can be. I have no distinguishing features or amazing ability and I don't care really. I do have a lot of interests along the way art was one that I kind of regretted not pursuing completely. I loved to sketch but not so much anymore. Plus, I can't. Not that I lost any part of my upper limbs but because my fingers aren't as limber as the used to be. Trying to produce a sketch of something is practically impossible now.
I'm just happy this is the way everything is. Maybe it's the burden of responsibilities and expectations that deters me to step out and volunteer myself to lead. Expectations can be a double edge sword sometimes. People would adore you when you succeed but the faces of disappointment would always be there when you fail. It is possible that that is one of the main reasons what I try not to be what I can be. I just like knowing that I've made a difference and yet at the same time remain anonymous. I guess this is why I love doing what I do and am looking forward to getting paid to doing what I love. I need money. I need a new phone!!!!!
I like the idea that I have a backseat to life. It helps me to understand a little more about being human. Yes, that's me. The faceless, chain smoking backseater.
This is one of those rare entries where there's nothing remotely funny or interesting to talk about. It's just something that's been swimming around in my head for the past couple of days.
Anyway, good night people. I have nothing more to add to this entry. And just so everyone's clear, my drive to write somehow died and didn't send me an invite to it's funeral. I don't know why I don't blog as much as I used to be. I think boredom killed it because boredom had nothing else to do. I am sorry for the lack of entries and for that I will sing you a song to soothe your broken heart.
Yeah right!!! Maybe in the next life. Goodbye.
